When we surveyed the options, we looked at a “zimmer” – a room in German, which translates to a fully furnished room in a quiet place, surrounded with amazing scenery, panoramic views, wholesome people, candlelight lit hot tubs and dinners, really strange people with a strong relationships to the environment.  In short – this is the anti-city environment.

We chose Rosh Pina.  Various reasons.  The grandparents live in Cabri, a Kibbutz near Nahariya.  It was like a military operation.  We picked the kids from school.  They were packed already and so were we.  We drove to the Gramps and after thirty seconds of kisses and warnings, we hit the road.

We arrived at Molly’s Suite at 15:00 and at 15:05 Dorit already told me to change position so the snoring stops, and she could sleep too.  If it wasn’t for the stupid cat stumping on the next door neighbor’s door, we would have slept for the night.  But, when we woke up at 18:00, the hot tub – a two engine full size two adults hot tub – looked extremely inviting.  I lit a few candles, poured some liquid into the tub, and two minutes later, we were basically boiling our asses in water so hot, that adding some celery and potatoes would have taken care of dinner as well.

We emerged out of the hot tub, red, relaxed, tired, and starving.  We looked at the few brochures and found “Julian”, a bar – restaurant.  we got dressed and drove over.  A side comment: I eat a lot less than I look.  Dorit and I started to order for one lately.  It’s working pretty well for us.  House salad (excellent, although someone must explain the presence of the pears), creamy Broccoli soup (divine), an entrecôte steak done to perfection, with some strange (but outstanding) mashed potato and sweet potato, nailed it.  As I said, one diner only, amazingly reasonable price.  Julian of Rosh Pina – a definite yes.

Back to the “Zimmer”.  Good night sleep.  Excellent mattress, complete silence, no interruptions.

Amazingly, in nine hours, we were able to achieve an afternoon siesta, a hot tub experience, an outstanding dinner, some quality time together.  If you’re looking to get away, quick disappearance into nothingness, good time – I recommend Molly’s Suite in Rosh Pina.

Link: Molly’s Suit.  Call Molly at 054-4859592.  Just like her suite (zimmer), she is calm, accommodating, helpful.  If you want to get closer to someone close, you may want to consider Molly’s Suit…

But here’s the twist.  We both know that at a certain point, usually five or ten minutes after we leave the house, I will turn around and go home.  We both know that leaving smelly surprises around the house are not an acceptable gift for our family.  The last piece of information, by the way, works both ways.  She knows that I would find it difficult to come home and report to the boss (my wife that is) that the dog came back leaving absolutely nothing in the street.  She concludes therefore, that I will keep going until she does something.  And she’s not completely wrong, unless of course some show is about to start in a few minutes (she has no access to this confidential information).

So there we are, out in the cold street.  I want to go back home, she wants to stay out.  We look at each other and the game starts.  She walks around, and in front of my hopeful eyes gets to position.  She smells the hope and decides to go sniff something new.  Disappointment.  A few more steps, and she starts to go around as if to find the exact hole in the ground which will serve as tonight’s toilet.  She sits in the strange way dogs sit when they’re about to introduce a new smelly surprise to the world, she even looks at me with reassurance as if to say: “don’t worry, you’ll get to watch your stupid show in a minute”.  But then that bastard neighbor’s dog shows up and they’re at each other’s behind sniffing as if Chanel number 5 is a thing of the past.  The last phenomenon probably explains why our dog Linda smells the same on both ends.  Disappointment.

That’s the point that I really give up, go home, and take the risk that what happened the other night would happen again.  What happened was that I woke up at 4:00 AM thinking that in my absence, my wife had accepted a homeless horse with some serious bowel issues as a house guest.  Instead, as it turned out, our dog, who had won the game that night, chose to leave a hefty pile of warm crap in the entrance to my youngest son’s room.  And there I was, 4:00 AM, in front of a busy work day, collecting warm and stinking pieces of fresh dung, cleaning and washing the floor, opening the windows to the cold night air.  What really struck me that night was that my expectation was for a 12 lbs dog to leave behind a few ounces of poop.  Instead, I saw a pile that resembles only large zoo animals production, or alternatively, large farm animals.  How the hell could this outstanding amount come out of such little dog.  Truthfully, I started thinking about accomplices, but then dismissed it as a crazy thought of a tired person at 4:00 AM.

We’re negotiating a truce.  I do hope that we can compromise.  Forget the TV and the dosing off.  Walk me all you want, just leave my house crap free.

The supermarket is another game I play with my wife.  She prepares a list of groceries for me, and I go get it every Friday morning after I drop the kids off at school.  I know the supermarket’s pretty well.  I know where almost everything is.  When I get in, I park the cart right inside the store, and I get the list out.  I study the list,  trying to memorize it.  My objective is to make a single pass of the store, getting everything the first time.  Never returning to the same aisle.  Dorit, who’s playing the game remotely, has a completely opposite objective.  Her objective is to to have me walk around the huge store, grabbing one product at the time, moving on to the other side of the store as the cart gets heavier and heavier and its front left wheel gets nastier and nastier with each turn.  The best is at the meats section.  One must take a number and wait the long line.  Once you use your turn to get whatever kind of meat you need, the turn is over forever, and realizing that somewhere down the list another kind was somewhere else on the list (why????), I must take another number and wait the line again.

I end up at the check out line behind the only old lady in the Middle East who still uses checks for grocery shopping.  Did I mention already that the definition of game is to determine a winner?  In my dog and supermarket game theory, the objective is to determine a loser.  Me.

He didn’t.  There was some unfinished business he had to take care of before the call could be made.  But when it was made, three weeks later, both felt that this was what they were waiting for very long time.

The man was recovering from a failed marriage.  He had two small girls, one was barely six years old, the other not even one.  He spent many years in a foreign country, from which he returned with excellent education and great working experience, but a clean bank account.  He was broke, living with his parents, starting a new job, trying to rebuild his life.  The woman saw through that.  In fact she saw in him what he wasn’t able to see at all.  She saw a young, determined, brilliant guy with a bright future.  She wanted to be part of that future.  They moved in together shortly after they met, and got married not too long after his divorce was finalized.

The man is me.  The woman is my wife Dorit.  Thirteen years, three continents, two children and thirty five kilos later ( on my side), we are still together, very much so, and I am still wondering what have I done to deserve her.

Thirteen years, Dorit.  I know I thank my lucky stars for sending you my way.